trek out to Dandenong for what was unfortunately the final EFL netball round to be held at Gloria Pyke Stadium. It will be fondly remembered for its canteens wide spread of lollies, and prices that have defied inflation since 2009. We loaded up our pockets before heading in for the big Mitcham double header on court 1. 

Mitcham Yellow were in trouble early with a side that looked drastically different from a fortnight ago. Their had been more personnel changes than at the Rowville Lakes Charcoal Chicken shop. At half time it was Park Orchards with the ascendency at 17-15. Luckily Charles Darwin’s survival of the fittest theory came to the fore in the second half as the Tigers showed why they are superior land animals to the sharks. Biologically there is a huge number of factors contributing to sharks not being able to survive on land, however being legless is not one of them as we see every day through the majestic snail. A late burst by Park Orchards spiced things up a little bit, but like me trying to win the love of my parents they came up short, with Mitcham holding on for a memorable 29-28 win.

Straight after, Mitcham Black were up against Forest Hill, whose mascot is a green and white zebra. I’m not even going to go into what’s wrong with that, but if you’ve ever seen a green and white zebra I’d love to hear about it. We continued in the same vein as last week playing a free flowing brand, which was helped by the return of Jess in goals. Despite rocking up in an Amsterdam hoodie, her eyes were clear, and she was shooting far too well for someone in a country with gun laws at tough as Australia’s. Another fresh face was Brynn ‘Dragonslayer’ Mackenzie. Bluey assured me she had a docorate in thug-ology, however further research confirmed she was only a normal doctor. Despite this shortcoming she was proving to be a more effective highway to goal than the Monash on the 1 day a year where traffic flows freely and there are no roadworks. 7-apiece was the ledger at 1/4 time.

The second quarter was all about our immense pressure which saw Forest Hill panic more than a Uni student that has to work two days in a row. We took a 15-11 lead into half time thanks in part to Long Arms, who was an immovable object down back, while Sarge Maka was proving an irresistible force through the guts. Despite being on the same team they have never met. Maybe one day they will and we will find out what happens when an unstoppable force meets an irresistible object.

The third quarter we really put them to the sword with some more slick ball movement through the middle of the court. Whiskers was purring like a Bentley, or one could even argue like a cat, on the wing, combining deliciously like salt and vinegar with Georgie, who was running riot in the centre. At 3/4 time we were well and truly in charge with a 23-15 lead. 

Forest Hill threatened early in the last, but like a teacher arguing that ‘their holidays aren’t really holidays’, Mitcham refused to yield. Harold continued her stellar form and helped put the exclamation mark on our 32-21! Win. A good result coming into the bye round next week as both sides continue to build.



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