The Firkin Magpie Vol 1 Number 11
Bugger all to write about as most people were on their best behaviour or put up a good smoke screen. Seriously though if anything reportable happens let me know. It’s hard work trying to track down the BS week after week.
Things could be on the improve though as Schnitzel Gray is back in town after 2 weeks up in the big smoke helping his little blister blow out 21 candles.
His 4 legged mate George got his L’s whilst he was away as Aunty Roseanna and great uncle Crowbar managed to leash the mutt and take it for walkies. In a match made in heaven George started cocking his leg in the direction of Jenine’s Lilly the most fashionable bitch in the Doo. Woof Woof.
There has been unconfirmed reports that Tim Krieger had been spotted wearing a suit. Incredible as it may sound this was in fact verified with photographic evidence being wacked in the watch. An embarrassed petrol pumper was quick to point out that it was only a minor hiccup and business was resumed as soon as possible (straight after the service)!
The Borderwatch also had a few candid shots of Luba and Bec cracking the champers at the opening of Collars and Cuffs. The terminal bluebagger now well on the way to his boyhood dream of owning a pizza shop in Lygon Street. So if your fritz and sauce sandwich at the Collar and Cuffs smells like eucalyptus oil you will know our ace trainer probably threw it together.
Now firmly in the spotlight of the paparatzi he rocked up a couple of editions later with ‘his good friend ‘ Matty roughhead Krammins. Also amongst the mugshots was Dean Godfather Opie giving a bit of unworldly advice to birthday boy Coggsy junior.
Back at the Tant game ten goal Timmy kicked arse for his best game this year and old Tuna Toms Bees scored a morale boosting win that was hopefully repeated against Nangas. Jacko is having a stella season and is looking pretty fit after lugging furniture in his shift to the Mount. Just keep out of Maccas before going to work at the Rural Yard.
Don’t worry about the sockheads mind numbing hooters just hang around Footy Park for a while as a thousand screeching cockatoo or three flap in for choir practice boom boom.
The Colliwobble kid Benny thought it would be a Berri good idea to take Missus Who up to watch young Brian play but old gunna did it again only making it to Bennys Hill.
Mick freckle Agnew reckon Tants Cav owes him big time after drawing him out for the AAA quality Doo redgum. Missus Webbs was pumped to get a mention in Paul Cavanaghs notes. The whistle blower looks set to get a choccy cake!
The ‘quite one’ of the Mules boys Johnny was anything but at church Sunday night having in depth discussions with coach Chrissy on the sides makeup in the run to the finals. The young fella reckons he spent too much time on the bench.
Roseanna circumnavigated the front bar. Under the circumstances our circumspect young lady dictated to the bar boys and was surprised at the results of her survey which was circumstantial evidence.
Our trippers to the Medindee Lakes Pud (+3 other puds) Butch and Shiney must be having a good time with no one hearing boo out of them back in the Doo. Kerry phoned home each day from Bali but the old Wepar tit puller hasn’t reciprocated.
Don’t forget to call into Memory Lane tonight. Also we have scrub day on 25th for the blokes with the sheilas going wine tasting and nipple licking.
Rod Morris’s pet monkey Marvin is still in the job after picking the Doo if he stuffs up this week the man from the Watch will be on the lookout for an octopus
Last Modified on 01/02/2011 14:24