Tough love or verbal abuse? For coaches and parents, the new lines are hard to define
Being competitive and driven is a healthy part of sports, that is, until it becomes toxic. There's been a discussion from the Washington Post about how parents, coaches, and even sideline spectators can distinguish when saying something "encouraging" or "motivating" is out of line.
Highschool Football coach DaLawn Parrish is used to raising his voice to alert his players on foul plays or poor judgements. That is until he realised the screaming, the yelling, the borderline abuse wasn't actually getting through to his players. In the game that changed his perspective on coaching, Parrish yelled “Next time, that’s going to be a flag and you’re going to be out of the game! What you just did!”, only to realise that "the times have changed" and it was not the right approach for his team.
The times certainly have changed, and with a greater focus on player mental wellbeing now than ever in history, coaches have to adapt the way they discipline, direct and manage players.
“What is considered macho is not macho anymore,” Parrish said. “You have to evolve with it, if this is what you want to do. And I’m also going to tell you — some things I agree with, and some things I don’t agree with. I don’t believe in excessive abuse, but there is a fine line between what is excessive and what is necessary.”
So, if you're a coach, committee member, fellow player, or parent that typically has a "tough love" approach and takes a critical stance on performance, things need to change.
“There were things that were done years ago that were unacceptable but were accepted,” said Jay Bilas, a former Duke basketball player who is now an ESPN analyst. “They’re not accepted anymore. And coaches that have not changed with the times are going to have problems.”
To read the full article from the Washington Post, please see this link.
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