Danny’s Diatribe/Dribble
The Diatribe is back by (un)popular demand and Danny plans for it to be bigger and better than ever with more stats, more gossip and carve-ups than ever before. Remember you can contribute on a weekly basis by sending us a message on our AFL Sydney Facebook page. So here we go....
Rampe raises the bat
Congratulations to former Phelan Medallist and UNSW/ES Premiership player, Dane Rampe who celebrated his 50th game in style for the Sydney Swans with a dominant display down back against Port Adelaide. He was duly recognised with five votes in the Coaches Association award. Also recognised were former Pennant Hills junior products, Kieran Jack (7 votes) and Jarrad McVeigh (1). Another fillip for football in Sydney.
Blues on the move
Obviously there was sad news last week when Campbelltown pulled out of the Premier Division competition. There was something for the Blues to celebrate after a dark week with a one-point victory in Division Four. With that said, there is plenty of talent on the move and currently in demand with other AFL Sydney clubs. Cameron Gordon, Mitch Hogan and Aidan Bell (Western Suburbs) are all confirmed transfers but at the time of writing, intrigue surrounds two of the biggest names from the Monarch stable.
Danny hears UNSW/ES and the Magpies are in the front runners for Representative player and Club Best and Fairest, Taran Etto, with Manly-Warringah also throwing their hats in the ring. Returning junior and NEAFL representative, Jason Fleming is also a chance to end up with a club in the Eastern Suburbs.
Look-A-Likes
Danny loves a good look-a-like and thanks to our unnamed source at Pennant Hills who has stitched up a couple of the boys.
If you look to the left you will see Brant Jack is a spitting image of Earl from My Name is Earl.
Small forward, Sam Zikman may be getting married soon but that hasn’t saved him from being compared with Ponch from a show called Chips.
Danny’s Short Shots
• Salome Cerda-Vargas was sighted kicking in the wrong direction twice in the Women’s Representative game against Canberra. Her excuse was that she was playing forward when she is usually a back.
• Manly-Warringah’s Hayden Washington was said to be relieved that their Premier Division clash against East Coast was not Match of Week after his role as a decoy produced minimal touches.
• Campbelltown’s Nathan Lomas showed up to one St George training session, getting fined for a headband and was never sighted again.
• Whilst on St George, Alex Wynn cops a hit for promoting having massive news, which was announced in front of the whole club only to hear crickets...... That news being instead of having pasta night every home game they now have it every week. Maybe a news presenters gig isn’t for you Wynny.
Fall of the GIANTS
Don’t worry it’s not a typo but maybe some of the Manly-Warringah boys need to wrapped up in cotton wool after celebrating their buzzer-beating win over East Coast. The incident report reads as follows:
- Harry Koch (test) injured his knee in the celebration after the after the siren goal kicked by Tom McCaffrey. He compounded the injury by drinking plenty of cans of his favorite cider Somersby later that night.
- Ethan 'Cheese' Panizza (test) also injured his knee running into the fence at Kanebridge Oval after Angus Buncle missed his target by 20m. He also compounded the injury with a few Perth bourbons he got sent over from back home
- Jack ‘Screech’ Hawkins (test) slipped and fell at a 60th party on Saturday night while dancing with team manager big ‘Smug’ Dale.
Sshhhh!
Which prominent Premier Division player - arguably in the best 3 or 4 players in the competition met a girl on a footy trip, fell in love, and left the footy trip to pursue his new love?
Bat files
Any club that mixes football and the social circuit stays in Danny’s good books and it sounds like the UTS Bat Cave has been active in the off-season. All eyes again this year will be on the club’s Ladies Day and word is the event invites that went out yesterday have been “very well received indeed.”
In other news, new recruit and youngster, Jackson 'Cossy' Cosgrove was absent from Saturday night’s pub celebrations at the new home of the Bats, The Royal Oak, due to his new girlfriend of one week saying he has had 'too much football', despite what the stats sheet said on Friday night vs UNSW/ES.
Another young recruit, Daniel Hines, is yet to play a game or even train with the main squad yet and has been first in the ice baths each night he turns up. Selfish young man.
Damon Collina, The Eastern Suburbs most decorated and underrated Bachelor has now been locked down by international model Jodie Lee –check her out @jodixlee. This comes as a blow as he had previously made a bet with current Cleo Bachelor contestant, Dean Ipaviz, that he would place higher than Ipa in the next event. A loss is imminent now.
Popular Sydney AFL bad boy, Thomas Zilm, has been running a very feminine diet this pre-season. To lose some kilo's and slim down for some midfield roles, he has taken on a 5 day a week, salad diet. This is 5 days of nothing but salad for 4 weeks. He has been quoted saying 'I love the salad'.
AFL Sydney ‘experts’?
Danny gives himself a clip this week after scoring doughnuts in the first round of the AFL Sydney Tipping Competition. I also make a public apology to the Pennant Hills club for not tipping them (I am a man of my word). Danny’s efforts weren’t much better than the two staffers, Matt Graham and Scott Burkinshaw who both only managed one correct tip.
Send me an Angel
Danny received this note from an unconfirmed source this week: Over the off-season Tommy Angel was looking in Melbourne to lock down some footy and a job, all the clubs weren't very happy with just him and were saying we want your brother to seal the deal (Harry) and that you're not good enough to warrant a move. When Harry broke his ankle skating in the offseason, it all fell apart and now he is lining up for Pennant Hills hoping Harry stays injured so coach Yard keeps giving him a game.
Rams reach milestones
Congratulations to the following Penrith players who notched milestones on the weekend:
50 Games - Jake Shelley and Jesse Hyland
50 Senior Grade Games - Luke Jones
Snow Medallist rained out
No one escapes Danny’s wrath and this week former Snow (Division One) Best and Fairest, Andrew Craig goes under the microscope. Now playing in the South Coast, the former Southern Power ruckman was said to rock up to his first round match last Saturday only to find it was washed out. Funny thing was that he was sent a text message in the morning and when he rocked up to the ground his young son was remarked to say “I don’t think it’s on Dad.” Fair call.
Last Modified on 16/04/2015 12:10
